Nudie Paintings and Other Fine Things

Regarding the arts in all their forms and glory--from Picasso to Penthouse.

Madam Governor

Somebody that is actually qualified is now running, how refreshing

New Yorkers, meet your new governor:

image

Well, in the running governor.

Not since porn star Cicciolina was elected to the Italian parliament has there been a sexier political candidate. The first thing you notice is her bust. Round, full, in the Dolly Parton/Jayne Mansfield sense, they are just too “perfect.” Then you notice her eyes: blue, piercing, determined.

Kristin Davis graduated from high school in central California at age 15. She earned a B.A. in business from St. Mary’s College while working in finance. The first hedge fund she worked for was bought by Fidelity, and she worked at hedge funds successfully for another 10 years. Then she became obsessed with the financial possibilities of sex.

Davis built the most successful escort service in world history. She had more than 100 girls and operated in 5 countries, with a call center in Uruguay. She could dispatch a $1,000-plus-an-hour call girl to a hotel or residence in Paris, Berlin, Gstaad, Rome, New York, L.A., Miami, Dubai, Montreal or elsewhere within minutes.

OK, I would not quibble with her business credentials, but the “sexier political candidate”  bromide is a bit of a stretch (at least for me). I find Yulia Tymoshenko (prime minister of the Ukraine) and Cristina Kirchner (Argentinian President) far sexier, but back to credentials. Not since Meg Whitman or even Mitt Romney have we seen a political candidate with this much business chops. And frankly, someone that understands budgets, the simple fact that monies coming in must exceed monies going out, and that spending that which you do not have is just plain bad business sense, this type of education is probably what is needed most, especially for those states (mine included) that is the most fiscally under water.

Davis says here platform is clear: “P-squared” — legalize and tax prostitution and marijuana. Davis thinks that could bring $2.5 billion or more in new revenue to New York, allowing the state to cut the more regressive income and property taxes. Davis backs gay marriage but also opposes gun control as a consistent Libertarian. With New York politicians in particular disrepute, perhaps New Yorkers will find Davis’s plans compelling.

What’s not to like? and a small tax on breast implants, balanced budget here we come.

And I would not even place her in the “novelty candidates” category, not like one of our own:

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Some would argue that the way the system works, Solomon could not sway the Democratic run legislatures (plaguing both California and NY) from their profligate spending ways, but, as the Tea Party’s have shown, the people can be stirred,  why not have someone with a nice rack do the stirring?

My mom is a California Republican, little-old-lady-in-tennis-shoes type. Loved Ronald Reagan. Never missed an election. She didn’t know what my business was when I got busted, but she’s never judged and now she’s excited that what happened to me became something positive. She will campaign with me in October.

Gee, I wonder if we are related?

The Butt Hurt Locker

I’ve got to call some bullshit on some of the controversies surrounding this movie.

Let me just start this right up by saying that I haven’t seen this movie. I don’t know anything about it other than some of the recent butt hurt that has begun circling the internetz about what it represents. I caught this article and had to take a pause. I never realized the idea that some might expect a “real” depiction of events from Hollywood.

dwex just put up a post about internet credibility and I wanted to add to it another idea. The “Butt Hurt Lockerz” didn’t seem to appear until just before the Oscars. Had this been a month ago, I’d probably have had to point to the movie on the web to show that it even existed. Now, the rage surrounding the movie is just as incredible as the idea as the fact that this movie will be listed as “fiction” in all listings. Does an industry that depicted a trip to the moon in the 30s was open cockpit, owe you a realistic depiction of the world? Does an industry that depicted an “Ewok” as a midget in a costume, or Mark Hammel as a Knight owe you a Mark Hammel as a super ninja warrior for the covert operations in Afghanistan?

Could it be that all this non-troversey was floated right before the Oscars, and any bloviating only adds to it? I am all for checking libtards at every level, and I don’t like the things I hear on almost a daily basis. However, I am a part of an industry that is one of the sole American exports still in demand (think about that one), one of the only ones still domestically requested, and one of the only ones that hasn’t concocted a demand from the local, state, or federal government a demand to bilk a McDonald’s worker for my bloated Union salary. We are actually a free market enterprise that gives people what they want, pays taxes, and doesn’t run for bail outs.

I could spend a lot of time defending why an alien would sound like James Earl Jones, or what an Ewok should look like based on historical record. I decided to grow the fuck up, and realize that Hollywood’s role in the world is not re-painting the Vatican for a minority. We sell movies.

That Is Going To Leave A Mark

The National Republican Senatorial Committee hits a home run

This little ditty has been making the rounds of late.

The party of “NO” may not have any power to do anything in government (for now) but that is not stopping their creative side from putting before the people the fruits of their voting decisions. Those software developers over at bing are feeling pretty low right about now.

My Main Problem with Avatar

Now that some time has passed, I wanted to talk about some serious problems I have with Avatar’s plot logic.

You wouldn’t know it by reading from me, but I am a very particular person about some things. I often will freely admit to not knowing things, just merely being emotional about them. It comes with the territory for artists (so give us a break, our sense of the world is slightly tweaked, for obvious reasons). We’re here to give you a visual/emotional perspective about how the world is.

One of the very selective things I am picky about is story. It literally built the entertainment industry, and like designing a 426 Hemi, they should be rock solid. People see through the window dressing almost immediately and see the foundation without hesitation. One of the things I took to design school with me from my Classical Art training is just how intuitive our eyes are. Have you ever looked at a portrait painting and said to yourself “this doesn’t look right?” Even at (don’t take this personally) the most basic level of artistic understanding, we are all very visually critical. Our eye is hyper-sensitive to the world around us, and it knows very easily between the reality and the illusions we try to create.

That’s where art comes into play. It’s an interpretation based on perspective.This is why the story behind Avatar is a tough one for me. I will, in a visual way, put myself into this new environment. I want to know why we’re doing the things we’re doing. For example, when I went Deep Sea Fishing, there was a story behind it. A ritual. Something I needed to learn after immersion into the culture.

What killed me about Avatar, was the existence of the Avatar. Seriously, if we posses the technology to clone not only us, but us and splice in an alien tied to our DNA, why do we need to be there? Couldn’t we just clone ourselves (humans) from afar and just send them to wipe the Indian Aliens out? I’ve had this argument at work and not received a convincing explanation about it yet. The most I heard was the exponential cost of making the Avatars.

It’s somewhat valid to me, but it doesn’t explain the cost of insurance in space. I think the Achilles Heel in the plot is insurance. Cameron freely admits that insurance exists in the future, so wouldn’t it be less expensive to Avatar humans instead of cryostasis of actual human travelers? For fuck sakes, the main character goes into this bid to get his legs back, simply because he can’t afford the insurance on it. Instead, the “supposed” evil people only Avatar a few Alien hybrids to smooth over political relations and explore some scientific endeavors (all of which do not work out for the company).

the movie never addresses (in my recollection) there is a distance established that is needed to control the Avatar. It could be that the Avatar is controlled from earth, which would mean that an entire army of humans could be Avatared from earth to mine this new planet. The risk to insurance ratio would be minimal, and the investment cost would be exponentially lower.

Someone sink my battleship, I’m trying to see if I am out to lunch on this,

The Australian Unemployment Rate Just Increased

Charts of futures contracts or naked shots of Naomi Watts? This guy made the wrong call

OK, the images were not of Naomi Watts ( that’s the only Aussie babe I could think of), more like Asian porn? I can’t tell.

But this is just too good for words and it begs the question ,“What was this guy thinking?”. There is clearly at least two women working on the floor in close proximity (that I counted) which would be fast tracking their butts right to H.R. if they saw any of this. Aside from goofing off at work, fostering a hostile work environment ( I believe that is the correct parlance ) is something management every where goes ballistic over.

And how about that ,“Oh, shit” look we get at the end?

I see ‘roo poaching in this guy’s future.

I can understand if he was ogling naked pics of Chris Bath…...............crikey!!!!!

Top 25 Women on Your List

From Hollywood, to Music to the runway, who’s the top 25 on your list?

While I was at lunch today at work, the topic came up for creating your top 25 hottest women. Our rules were simple, they need to translate to now (so while Brooke Shields in Blue Lagoon is hot, it doesn’t mean that she’s hot now). So, you’d have to vouch for her being hot to this day. That hopefully encompasses MILFs.

I haven’t finished my list yet, I was given until tomorrow to finish it. I thought I would put it out there on the VO, just to see how we think. For our Ladies (this probably comes down to pfluffy, Repmom, and a few others-or any of our gay members, too) the ladies and gay men at work are also composing a list of the 25 hottest men. Hopefully Adam Lambert is not on this list. The same rules apply as the ladies, they need to have held up, if they’re not morning donuts.

I am really thinking about this one, but I will tell you just a few that are DEFINITELY on my list. Angelia Joe Lee, Rosario Dawson, Penelope Cruz, Catherine Bell, Cassie (OMG, oh yes), Kim Kardashian (she loses points for dating a douchewad like Ray Jay-but still hot), Jessica Simpson (so hot in Dukes of Hazzard), and many more I won’t touch on yet. This is just a little taste of what my reveals are.

Let’s have a little fun and see where we land. Ladies-our gays, who is the man candy list? As men are showing off our best in boxers in front of the PS3, we do often wonder what you ladies fantasize about.

In Search For Perfection

The planets are all lining up, will we get the Superbowl everybody wants?

I have been debating this post for two weeks now, and if the house of cards all come tumbling down tonight, its not my fault, so back off.

For those living in caves, 2 NFL teams are still undefeated, and it’s not just any 2 teams, it’s the two teams that America absolutely adores. Forget the ‘boys, they can’t win in December so even smoking hot cheerleaders is not enough for them to hold the moniker of “America’s Team”. But in the last few years, two other teams have decided to fill the void, and they got style in abundance. 

First, who dat gonna beat dem Saints? N.O. has gone from abysmal underachievers, to wayward stepkids playing their home games in circus tents due to Katrina and its aftermath, to honest to God alpha dogs, winning games either too easily or too lucky for words. Beating the Skins two weeks ago was just plain ridiculous, but then last week, with that lame ass fake field goal, any other team would of went down. At this point, I can only chalk it up to providence.

Ditto with the Colts. We have seen them go 8-0, even 10-0, but this year they keep winning ugly. Providence reared its head last week when for the first time in Manning’s career, he threw 3 picks….......and they still won.

Tonight, Manning and company travel to Jacksonville, a team needing a win for any playoff hopes and the first sold out game this year. Jim Caldwell has said that he will only play his “healthy” players tonight. They have home field locked up through out the playoffs so this game is of little consequence, except to continue the drive for perfection. NFL teams routinely rest critical players at season end so benching some starters would not be out of the ordinary. But will the fans allow it? Not only Indi fans, but the rest of the country?

After tonight, they got the Jets and the Bills, not exactly powerhouses.  Caldwell is in a tough spot. Throw a game to rest players and history suffers, go for the streak and get somebody hurt, again, hell will have to be paid.

The Saints got the Cowboys (at home), then the Bucs and the Panthers. I think they got the best chance of running the table, but will they?

The scenario is playing out like a Dickens’ novel. The whole world wants to see an undefeated Colts team play an undefeated Saints in the Superbowl, what kind of ratings you think that would pull in?

We need someone to go undefeated to shut those old Dolphin players up, although why anyone would think that record is of equal weight and magnitude to someone doing it now is beyond me. It is analogous to all those titles won by the old Boston Celtics (when there was only nine teams in the league, and only 3 were any good year in and year out). What the Dolphins did 30 years ago was great, but this would be truly spectacular.

So here are the questions:

Will both teams go undefeated?

Will they meet up in the Superbowl?

Should Peyton and Caldwell forget about any records and nurture their perspective teams (bench starters in meaningless games) to give their teams the best possible chance at winning a title?

Will the Colts go down tonight?

And most important, does the very fact that I am writing a post on this damn all chances straight to hell of the perfect scenario?

Rogueing Reagan Ramblings

Palin going to the Reagan well, fair or foul?

I must say, never in a million years would I of thought that I would post anything from David Frum (although here, its just from his blog but not penned by him specially). Frum is one of those phony baloneys like David Brook, or Andrew Sullivan, pretenders that waive their stale antiquated Republican credentials around to give them cover for the real task at hand, bashing the conservative movement. But I found something on the Frum blog that resonated with me concerning the Reagan mystique and its all to frequent hijacking.

As Sarah Palin embarks on a publicity tour for her book, conservative commentators have again taken to likening the former Alaska governor to the GOP’s revered conservative icon Ronald Reagan.  Palin, like Reagan, brands herself as an articulate conservative.

Both Palin and Reagan were governors from Western states, but the similarities end there.  When Reagan entered the White House, he had successfully completed two terms as governor of California and had run for president against President Ford.  Palin chose not to complete her first time as governor.

Reagan’s Republicanism was that of the big tent—the kind where contrasting opinions, even on matters like abortion, were tolerated.  The Republican party of the 1980s, under Reagan, provided a comfortable home to social conservatives, fiscal libertarians, and intellectual neoconservatives.  Although this coalition existed in some form as early as 1968, it was Reagan who knew how to unite the center-right and the right.  Today, Palin commands the allegiance solely of modern social conservatives.

Although I agree with the premise laid out here, that being that Reagan had literally decades of observations and experiences to formulate a cogent point of view where as Palin is still a tin horn, green behind the ears, and sorely lacking in those life’s experiences that can shape opinions, where I think the article goes off the tracks is the similarities in the fertile fields of discontent with the masses that sprung forth a Reagan (or a Palin) as an answer to what people wanted at the time.

We have all heard that it took a Carter to give us Reagan, although that somewhat diminishes the Reagan brand, a well thought out approach as to what this country should stand for, it is probably pretty accurate in that it provided bigger tent, bigger than what the message alone could provide.

From a maturation standpoint, The Reagan philosophy was farther along in his early years, when he was touring the country to further the War Bond effort, or when he was touring the world giving speeches for GE, and it was decades after this point that he got the center stage. Palin, in contrast, was foisted on to center stage barely 3 weeks from getting the VP tout, woefully unprepared.

It should also he remembered that Reagan was “The Man” through out his development, he was the master of his ship, where Palin was the comedic side kick, who’s job was to feed the headliner softballs, to make him look good, so from the very beginning she was a side dish and had no real power in the campaign.

Reagan helped to relieve the country of the malaise that had plagued it since the 1970s and to revitalize Americans’ love for their country and interest in government.  It is hard to imagine the Great Communicator ever going rogue.

Again, not a fair comparison since Reagan was always the headliner so going rogue was unnecessary.

Palin can have a place in politics, with a short half life, that being to put a pretty face on a huge populace movement of discontent with the size, direction, and inefficiency of a behemoth government, out of touch and out of control. The Tea Party movement has provided examples that a big tent does exist and tapping into that sentiment successfully could propel someone wise enough to see it very far.

As an aside, I will be glad when Palin’s book tour subsides somewhat. This past week, foxnews has been transformed into The Palin Network (just the personality shows, mind you, not the actual news shows). Understanding the dearth of coverage the other networks provide, I’m willing to roll with this, to a point. But bigger fish are on the skillet so let’s get cooking.

Giving New Meaning To The Term “Bilingual”

New Reebok ad is drawing some flak, justified?

So what do ya think?

Some women bloggers are none too happy over two boobs chatting with each other.

The video is so stupid, condescending and sexist that it makes me completely disinterested in ever buying anything Reebok again

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that Dr. Clouthier.(who I’ve read before, but mostly on political issues) is clearly in the minority. I think the ad appeals to women because ,well, after all, which woman does not want a tight butt? And it appeals to men for the obvious reasons (talking boobs, someone is just coming up with this concept now?).

Here’s my take, I think that the good doctor does not like the ad because it reinforces some female stereotypes that are not altogether very flattering, like being catty and gossipy. Those boobs don’t have the decency to address their complaints to the butt directly, no, they talk behind the butt’s back (what? you know what I mean), they gang up on the butt and talk smack, making the butt the butt of their jokes. Then, they call the butt “stupid” and laugh in unison at how clever they are, how superior they have made themselves at the expense of another part of the anatomy (one that doesn’t speak, BTW).

But if successful marketing is getting your product noticed, whether tasteful or not, then Reebok has hit a home run with this ad.

Considering what we’ve seen in the past from Nike, Gatorade,  Victoria’s Secret, even various beer commercials (go to youtube and type in “sexy” or “banned” commercials, your rig will be smoking for a week) I’m not getting all the hub bub.

Car Design and the American Brand-Going Global

I had a chance to visit my old school, Art Center to get a little thermometer on how the car industry is coping with this recession.

I went up to my old school last weekend to plug for some interns, and see just how the passion that I left was shaping up to face the new challenges of the day. Not much has really changed on the student end, the students who get into the industry are car nuts who revel in speed and exotic cars. Most of the student work is still focused around designing premium wheels, aimed at the rich boy with 500,000 to spare on Supercar rolling sculpture. I’d wag the finger at them, but I designed many myself in my fantasy world, mostly centered around armored and UAV’s that would frighten the person in front of you.

What I really didn’t see much, and was pretty telling, was sponsored projects. Our school has always had a relationship with the industry, and they used to sponsor projects to look for talent. This sends my mind reeling because, to me, it means that the industry is doing one of two things. Either they’re not confident about the market and are looking to cut back on new development, or they’re not wanting to release any big ideas that they’re working on to one another. I believe it’s a combination of both, but the students were much more telling in explanation of the current events.

Many of the people that I went to school with who are now in the automotive industry are quitting and looking outside of the industry to get work. It’s a low pay job, and there’s simply nothing for the people that are passionate about cars to cling onto. I even got a Facebook message from a friend that he’s looking for work in 2010 (he’s in a major car design studio). I have heard from several that there’s no money in the business.

If someone really wanted to ask me why I feel that the state of the current American car market is this way, I blame it on deluding the idea of the American brand that was cemented in the late sixties. Blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and some cigarettes rolled up in the arm band-it never goes out of style, as the muscle cars of the late sixties never go out of style. I was having a conversation with one of my car design buddies about this the other day. he asked me what I would buy right now if I had money to burn. I responded that I would actually just buy an old muscle car in mint condition and opt out of any of the current offerings.

When asked the reason, I explained that that was when our brand was distinct, innovative, and if you want to talk about timeless rolling sculptures that most anyone could own…Look no further than the big three. Nowdays, I look at any car, and unless I can clearly see the branding, it’s becoming very difficult to distinguish between any of them. German cars are as wild and erratic in design as anything from Asia. Asia copies anything they see from Europe, and America is either ripping off their former glory, or trying to be like Asian tuner cars themselves.

I also feel that I was probably more right when I was in school about what is becoming the current state of the American market. If you look at many commercials peddling our wares, you’d see that a great many are sold on the idea of safety. Most of my concepts were centered around the idea of surviving the trip from point A to point B. I even had, at one point proposed a straight up military vehicle to roam the urban streets of America. It was pretty garish sitting next to a four seater Ferrrari concept, but I gotta wonder for all of my buddies now designing tail lights on glorified Volvo frames, I bet they’d probably relent a little on my vision.

Me as a person in the market wants nothing but muscle, and environmental damage. Me as a person placing myself in the shoes of the average American these days, designed a rolling fortress.  I am still of the opinion that the designers in the industry and decision makers are trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. It’s impossible to make a sexy rolling security fortress. They’ll keep on trying to do it, but some things are just an assumed risk.

Going for Green-Fixie Bike Cruising SF

Pretty cool video I found today.

I don’t have a “fixie” but it’s been a really popular trend in Cali to have one. I see a sprinkling of them here, but up in the Bay, they’re serious about them. I’ve heard that some posses will even band together and get on freeway on-ramps to take over a lane of the freeway (something I consider insane). I found this video today from an artist that I absolutely love, who is also an avid bike rider.

Cruisin’ in SF from Giant One on Vimeo.

If you want to know what it feels like to ride in the streets, it’s exactly like this video. you have the right most lane, and on the right of you are the parked cars. You’re looking out for both sides, and hoping that no one pulls out, at the same time hoping that the person in the right lane doesn’t ram you into a parked car. You can see both in the part of the video, where Giant heads down the hill. The bike lane gets flanked by a car pulling out from parked, which he avoids on the way down. That’s pretty dangerous on a fixie. You gotz no hand breaks.

The part that freaks me, is the move he makes at the bottom with the light (next to the bimmer). Holy shit, he pretty much ran that light and tried to use the bimmer for protection. That wouldn’t have protected him at all from a T-Bone (even hitting the bimmer first).

It’s pretty cool, otherwise, and I *LOVE* Rebel 8’s art and clothing. I wear a lot of it myself. Check out his blog. I would get a tattoo from this guy too, if I could. I love the art style he’s created. The clothes are very tastefully done as well. Hope you agree, and tell me if you like it or not. Or not.

Show and Tell at the VO

Here’s what I do, what do you do? Who do you like?

I’m not very shy about what I do, and really the only reason I don’t post more about it is because I get worried about the repercussions of where I work. That doesn’t mean I can’t share with you what I have done in the past. I am actually a trained American Illustrator in the same vein as Norman Rockwell. I was trained under the school of art of a person named Fred Fixler who was a student of the same school as Rockwell. I was very privileged to have learned this heritage, and it bore one of my influential teachers, someone named Shawn Zents. About half way through this process, I realized that the game was changing, so I decided to get into product design, taking with me the lessons of illustration I had learned. However, my time studying American Illustration (which, at the time, leant itself to movie poster art) went with me. Here’s some of what I accomplished while in school.

Update:

I resized the images so they’re a little bit larger under the fold.

Miss California Under Attack For Sexy Pictures

Clearly, the media has unfinished business with her

With partially nude photos of her popping up on Web sites questioning her Christian credentials, Miss California USA Carrie Prejean has fired back, claiming the racy pictures are just modeling shots and vowing to continue her battle against same-sex marriage.

“I am a Christian, and I am a model,” Prejean said in a statement released overnight to the media. “Models pose for pictures, including lingerie and swimwear photos. Recently, photos taken of me as a teenager have been released surreptitiously to a tabloid Web site that openly mocks me for my Christian faith. I am not perfect, and I will never claim to be.”

...

The images may also hurt her status as a spokeswoman for conservative causes. “She can continue to advocate for causes, but I don’t think these causes are going to advocate for her,” Ken Baker of E! News told NBC.

Baker, of course, just gave away the true reasoning behind these attacks: destroy her and shut her up for daring to speak heresy.  This is the exact same kind of relentless hatred that Sarah Palin has been dealing with for months.  Eventually, I’m sure that Andrew Sullivan will be running around demanding that she produce airtight evidence that Prejean wasn’t born a man.  Liberals’ obsession with crushing attractive conservative women is starting to become disturbing.  I’d like to know if NOW or one of those other nitwit bimborganizations is going to defend her, for that matter.

For the record, I agree with Prejean that there should be nothing morally contradictory with her previous modeling work.  If it was okay between her and God for her to appear in beauty pageants, which are all about objectifying women as sexual objects and all that, there’s no reason why those pictures should be wrong either. 

The true hypocrisy is among her left-wing haters, who would have no problem with anyone else doing this who didn’t publicly state a position with which they disagree.  The fact is that they see a woman they need to crush and they’re going to keep pushing it.  Usually, I don’t care about these pageants, but what I am seeing here is another coordinated media attempt to silence an ordinary person who happens to be conservative.  That is what I’m mad about.  Expect more of her personal information to come out very soon.  I hope she holds fast.

MSNBC

UPDATE: This from last week:

“In the entire history of the Miss USA, no reigning title holder has so readily committed her face and voice to a more divisive or polarizing issue,” organizers said in a statement.

That’s pretty dirty when you recall that it was one of pageant’s fucking judges who injected that polarizing issue into the event in the first place.  Prejean gets set up for that and then attacked by those who let it happen in the first place.  When did Miss Thoughtcrime become a title, anyway?

The Age Old Question

Who wrote this simulation, Norm Coleman’s campaign manager?

We have tackled some rather weighty issues of late, what does and what does not constitute “torture”, are we one step away from the socialist Euro-weenies we have been making fun of all these years, is “Animal House” type diplomacy the way to go, does Obama really love his country, and what’s up with those sagging man boobs of his, but I think it is high time we address the more salient issues of the day. So, to start off the trend to elevate the blog to more high brow topics, I present the killer of all topics, and one that will surely be debated for generations to come.

Anyone daring to post anything on this topic better bring their “A” game, have had a good night sleep and be sufficiently fueled up because some spontaneous combustion will surely result from these brains cells rubbing together.

We have all seen and heard of the more stupider comparisons,  Batman vs The Green Hornet, Spidey vs. Daredevil, even Alien vs. Predator, we’ll save those discussion for the lite weights.

First of all, in considering an actual fight between these two combatants, I would think that the ninja, due to his sword (for simplicity sake we will lump the Katana, Ninjato, and Gundo all together as one generic kick ass sword) abilities and his agility (don’t you just love all those somersaults and shoulder rolls he did in the video?) would have the edge with regards to actual combat. And I have to admit, I did not know what a “Black Egg” was, but I found it rather useless in close combat.

The most bad ass MFer I’ve seen in a while was Ujio in “The Last Samurai.

I could not find a shorter scene highlighting only his skills, but most here have seen the movie and can speak to his Ginsu talents.

Contrast his fighting ability to the best the Spartans have to offer.

Cool scene, but those Persians sure were a bunch of pussies. I think those Russians at the soccer fight could of handled these Persians, no wonder Xerxes had no respect for them.

The Hoplite spear (I have seen references to it being both 7 and 8 feet long) had far superior range to the ninja sword, but I would think a ninja could muster 3 full swings, severing a limb with each, by the time a Spartan could manipulate a killing potential lunge with that spear.

I don’t know, the software guy did admit that 65 times out of 100 the Spartan would come out on top, much like a Laker/Cav series (oops, now I’ve done it) so the ninja does get his share of victories. Me personally, I would put Ujio against Leonidas any day of the week. Keep the throwing stars (light weight, not to cumbersome to carry, and one out of 10 might do some damage), but lose the black eggs.

Another factor to consider, the strength of the Spartans lie in their line of defense where each shield protected the man to his left, like the phalanx, it relied on a community effort for effectiveness. The ninja needed no such support, he could fight just as well (probably better in that it gave him room to do his nifty acrobatics) alone as in a group.

So, what say you guys? And ladies, I know pugilism is right up your alley, but let’s not manipulate all the comments, OK?

This Kinda Makes Me Want To Go Back To Work

Men are horn dogs, but that’s a good thing!!

Only 300 business deals and that hooker from the other post could sport some of these.

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(@12:27PM 03/09/10)
dwex: Should I add “beneath my tinfoil beanie” to the categories, rich?

From: Fear And Self-Loathing In California
(@12:22PM 03/09/10)
richtaylor: You guys are missing the obvious here, this was a clever ruse by Ashburn to curry sympathy. Yes, he is gay, but there was no…

From: Fear And Self-Loathing In California
(@12:18PM 03/09/10)
Manwhore: and so he would still be able to live happily in the closet. And for the record, what do any of us know about being…

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