We have tackled some rather weighty issues of late, what does and what does not constitute “torture”, are we one step away from the socialist Euro-weenies we have been making fun of all these years, is “Animal House” type diplomacy the way to go, does Obama really love his country, and what’s up with those sagging man boobs of his, but I think it is high time we address the more salient issues of the day. So, to start off the trend to elevate the blog to more high brow topics, I present the killer of all topics, and one that will surely be debated for generations to come.

Anyone daring to post anything on this topic better bring their “A” game, have had a good night sleep and be sufficiently fueled up because some spontaneous combustion will surely result from these brains cells rubbing together.

We have all seen and heard of the more stupider comparisons,  Batman vs The Green Hornet, Spidey vs. Daredevil, even Alien vs. Predator, we’ll save those discussion for the lite weights.

First of all, in considering an actual fight between these two combatants, I would think that the ninja, due to his sword (for simplicity sake we will lump the Katana, Ninjato, and Gundo all together as one generic kick ass sword) abilities and his agility (don’t you just love all those somersaults and shoulder rolls he did in the video?) would have the edge with regards to actual combat. And I have to admit, I did not know what a “Black Egg” was, but I found it rather useless in close combat.

The most bad ass MFer I’ve seen in a while was Ujio in “The Last Samurai.

I could not find a shorter scene highlighting only his skills, but most here have seen the movie and can speak to his Ginsu talents.

Contrast his fighting ability to the best the Spartans have to offer.

Cool scene, but those Persians sure were a bunch of pussies. I think those Russians at the soccer fight could of handled these Persians, no wonder Xerxes had no respect for them.

The Hoplite spear (I have seen references to it being both 7 and 8 feet long) had far superior range to the ninja sword, but I would think a ninja could muster 3 full swings, severing a limb with each, by the time a Spartan could manipulate a killing potential lunge with that spear.

I don’t know, the software guy did admit that 65 times out of 100 the Spartan would come out on top, much like a Laker/Cav series (oops, now I’ve done it) so the ninja does get his share of victories. Me personally, I would put Ujio against Leonidas any day of the week. Keep the throwing stars (light weight, not to cumbersome to carry, and one out of 10 might do some damage), but lose the black eggs.

Another factor to consider, the strength of the Spartans lie in their line of defense where each shield protected the man to his left, like the phalanx, it relied on a community effort for effectiveness. The ninja needed no such support, he could fight just as well (probably better in that it gave him room to do his nifty acrobatics) alone as in a group.

So, what say you guys? And ladies, I know pugilism is right up your alley, but let’s not manipulate all the comments, OK?